Davina McCat Speaks

Day 28 in the Big Cat House

Well, it would be day 28.  I think.  Apparently cat years are the same as dog years which would be seven.  As I get more and more established in the 'house' I probably won't be that bothered about time.  There will be far too much time spent in a cosy sunspot to be doing with maths quite frankly.

So.  What has been going on?  Some friends of my servants (in the real world) are employed by a cat called Ziggy.  I thought my luck was in and that I'd have a fellow feline with which to scratch and purr, but no.  He didn't look bad in that suit, except I think for a split second all the girlies thought they'd been delivered either a butler, a pall bearer or Tommy Lee Jones with one of those flash-in-your-eyes thingamajigs...

Then, Big Brother on the Couch.  'scuse me, but that couch is MINE.  I've sniffed it, rubbed my teeth on it, and even carved my name in the leg.  Wassall that about people sticking out their tongues?  I do that all the time when I'm purring, and no one ever gives me a pussychological makeover.

...but how superb is the freezer.  Full to the brim with fish.

A happy cat?

You decide.

Night One

Well what a shower.  Unfortunately I missed the arrival of the last four females because BB eventually opened the garden door, and I had to 'go' outside.

I shall be reserving judgement, at least for the time being, rather like Tracey last night, sitting quietly and watching all the twittering around her.

I said I was hoping they'd have chickens again...but instead of live ones there is that fabulous lovely Damian Hurst touch...but the house is FULL of birds anyway!  Hours of stalking ahead I feel...

I think that'll do for now, but in the meantime, I have to profess an interest in the slightly overheard conversation about bitchiness...they have all decided not to be bitchy...'because girls are always bitchy aren't they'...we shall see...perhaps they will be catty instead...as I said, we shall see...

You decide.

I feel I must introduce myself...

PLEASE ENSURE YOU READ ANY COMMENTS AND POSTINGS FOUND HERE IN A GEORDIE ACCENT

I ask this, because it is difficult enough to type at the best of times, but you try typing in a dialect...nigh on impossible isn't it.  Even with opposable thumbs. 

Anyway, I feel I must introduce myself...particularly if we are going to be sharing any time together over the next interminable period during which Channel Catre and E phwoar broadcast this years epic entitled Big Brother 2007.

I am the cat with no name.  I am a Geordie.  You will never see me.  There will not be photographs of me, or anybody or anything associated with Big Brother.

I am the voice behind all that I see and that may well only ever be the edited highlights because after all, I'm a cat, and like most cats, I tend to sleep during the day.

I was plucked from nearly 43 entries to be the feline voice on this years competition.  It was fierce, (and a couple of the other entrants were too) but I got through on the tie-break which was how long we could juggle a live mouse for until it a, ran away, or b, died.  Mine passed on after a gruelling eleven minutes. 

Anyway, I have been kept in this hotel for the last five days so that I don't let on who any of the human contestants are.  I haven't seen any of them yet anyway.  For the moment, if I can't chase it, eat it or sleep on it, there is very little interest to be had in anything really.

So, tomorrow I will be travelling to the House in my own limousine and will be there to welcome everybody.  I'm just hoping they have chickens this year...

You decide.

Day minus one and counting - Big Brother 2007 - a pussy's perspective

Until the next series of Big Cat starts tomorrow night...Have checked on net and it appears that there should be plenty of small sunbathing type areas in which to tan my tummy. Am a tad unsure about the bath in the living room. Original 2-d inspection shows ideal hiding area from which to attack unwitting ankles, but also splashing hazard alert. Am hoping that garden furniture all inflatable as well placed claw may cause all manner of mayhem.

Must yawn, stretch and sit on remote control now. Minder has ten bob each way on 'Minzapint' in the 15.45 at Haydock.

Minzamouse under the sideboard since last Thursday.

You decide.