Busy life

Almost a month since i updated this blog!  its just been a busy life!!!   Between kids, homeschooling, house, dogs, working out, running around like a chicken without a head, there is never realy anything new going on!!   I turned 30. I think i told you.  I forgot.  Im getting old...so i forget!

My dear  husband just brought me a coke with what i believe is tequila in it.  It could be Rhum, im not sure.  I dont think tequila goes with coke, so its probably rhum... what do i know!! i know its good, i know its making me relax and i know i appreciate whatever he serves me. hehe   Hey i`ll take whatever ya serve me! haha 

I finally found a bathing suit that FIT me!! Yay!!!  I did have to buy 2 pieces... because my top doenst fit with my bottom. They are both huge, mind you, hahahahaha  but as far as bathing suit business, it usually doesnt work that way.  And no, i will not post pictures of me in my bikini on here.  You wouldnt want to see anyway.  Its been years since i wore a 2 pieces.  But now that i am deformed, i got to go at it again.    My husband says im hard on my body and as long as he is `hard` on it too, it`s all that matters.  Yea, he`s a pervert.  So am I. hahahaha    Sorry.... it must be the drink! 

My mother in law has been in town.  Uh-oh!  haha  Seriously, she has not been spending a lot of time at our house.  She told Jay and I to go out for the week end to celebrate my birthday. It was such a great surprise!   Jay made reservation in Indiannapolis and off we went!  We were gone from Friday 4pm to Sunday 6pm.   Of course its the first time ever that we were away from the kids that long and it was sooooo good!! I let go of my worries about leaving the kids, and we had such an amazing, hot, peaceful, awesome time. Enough said haha  Monday was a tough day... being back in the real world!!!

Mother and law bought me a sign for our front door.  I LOVE it... hahahaa it suits us so well. I laughed so hard when i saw it, and i didnt hesitate putting it up. It reads :     ''Forget the dogs, beware of the kids'' hahaha   isnt that so good? haha yes, i know, it doesnt take me much.

Talking about the dogs... anyone know how to train a 4months old puppy to go to the bathroom OUTSIDE??  this is getting so old....  we love her, but man!!   I removed our family room area rug, our master bath rug too, because she was ruining them!!! i washed them, and put them away.  Yikes!  Other than thinking I am his possession, Shiloh has been a pretty good dog.   

I feel  so drained. 

You know me, i dont spend much time talking about the more negative side of life.  I focus on the positive. At least I try to!   Plus, d.r.a.i.n.e.d.  is that really negative?   its just a word no? Its the word ''feel'' that makes it negative.  And, our feelings play with us most of the time. I must be feeling drained, overwhelmed; but this feeling will not last.    And because i know  that, I know that i`ll be ok. I know that this feeling does not mean the truth, therefore, i already feel better.   Dont we all feel drained at times?   Our own circonstances in life makes us feel that way, because no matter what we are living, we give our all (well most of us anyway) and  at some point, we see needs , problems and obstacles we feel we cant go thru better than we actually are, and we see that we need to do a bit more, just a bit, or a lot.... actually... and we feel overwhelmed. The truth is... we either have too many expectations and have to slow down, or we simply have not been doing as much as we think we are.  I think the first explanation is most likely for good, self sacrificing people. For the rest, its probably the second.     Does it really matter?  Soon or later, we feel better. We find a way....  we survive.... we grow.... we get stronger.....  what does not kill you can only make you stronger, right?   

Feelings..... I love my husband. I really do. I am often shocked by how obvious and certain his love for me is.  I lived for what seems so long, not feeling the love of a man... hearing it, but not feeling it.  Love... feeling loved... should always go together.  An abusive relationship can do so much damage to a person.  I know... i experienced it, and even tho it was so painful,  i wouldnt change it, because now, i appreciate real love that even more.   I do not expect, nor do I want, a perfect love; because love is, simply!!   When you are truly loved, you feel it. You have no doubt, even when its not perfect.  My life use to seem as perfect in the eyes of others , yet the love was not there.   That was a sad state indeed.   When you have love, imperfection becomes perfect.

I still fear my ex husband. I know it sounds silly... but i am still afraid of him. I dont spend much time thinking about it, but when i do, i feel a lot of pity.  I forgave him everything he has done to me, but i cannot forget.   I dont think we shoudl forget when someone hurt us greatly.  We should forgive, but not forget.   Forgetting would make us fools.

My dear husband is watching '' Fracture''.  I am paying '' some '' attention to it, too.   I saw it with Nicholas :)   Its really good!!!   Its a really good ''mystery'' movie.    I told Jay that if he could figure it out before the movie was over,  he was a genius.  Well,  now only 20mins into the movie, he has!!!  He just doenst know it yet. I am making him suffer by not teeling him he is right, yet. hahaha    I have never watched a movie with him without him figure out the ending early on in the movie!!!  That guy is a genius. That's why I married him. yea yea.   im a genius to have married him too! hahaahah

I can just read our add in the Match.com add; lets just pretend for a minute:

male, 48yo, looking for younger woman, loving kids, likes to clean the floor on hands and knees, in need of a real man to truly love her.         

Feminists wouldnt like that one. hahahahhaha    I am not one, so who cares? hehehe

arent we cute tho?

yea i know you`ve seen it.  But i like it.  he was actually telling me how great I am. Isnt that so sweet?  

I guess i should let you go before the drink im having kicks in real good and i start singing  too loud. 

I am leaving you with the latest photos.  At your own risks! haha

I ''think'' this is all.   Other than my husband just told me the other half of the movie....  how can he be so good, i dont know. THAT movie was really hard to figure out!!!!  You have to watch it to see!!   Great actors... good movie! 

Ryan is the actor that played in '' The Notebook''. I loved that movie. Of course, its a chick flick. I am usually not a huge ''chick flick'' kinda girl, but the notebook, i did love.   I am picky. I didnt like the love story they added to the ''Titanic''.  I did enjoy the drawing session.    hahaha   does that make me a pervert?   haha I better sign off before i scare you off!!    

Have a wonderful night!! and remember..... SMILE!!!  

11:49 - Wednesday, April 23, 2008 - post comment

Untitled Comment

hehe you always make me giggle. It sounds busy and fun. I wish I could live near you. I think the kids would have a blast and we could have lots of fun. I'd love to just have one very close friend near me. *sigh* You guys are such a wonderful family. I love your door sign. I imagine it fits very well.

I have no advice on the puppy except having a potty schedule, every 30 mins or so outside, like with a toddler. Good luck.

Geekette - 09:08 - Friday, April 25, 2008

---