| Seduction Guide |
Connecting With The Woman Of Your DreamsSometimes it takes ultimate concentration to change your reality. Sometimes that reshaping will allow things to come to you (seemingly or otherwise). And sometimes you just have to trust enough to try something, and judge the results as they flow in. This is one of those times.What kind of woman do you want? So now you should know what kind or relationships you want. Regardless of what will make you happiest, there’s still one other thing you need to figure out. What kind of woman do you want? Now, I’m not talking about blonde or brunette. Face it, that’s not important. Ok, I apologize if this is important to you. And I’ll buy you some wigs. Seriously, what’s really important? If looks, what is it you like? Legs? Breasts? Thin or BBW? Tall? Petite? Don’t be shy here – what floats your boat? Of course, once you’ve gotten a good amount of success, the looks decrease in importance (because they’ll all look good). What kind of PERSONALITY are you looking for? I hope I’m not challenging you too much. But after you’ve had enough ladies, you’ll want more than simple hots. You’ll want someone interesting (unless you’ve decided to simply pursue sex – in which case focus on the physical). So now, take a look at what type of lady you enjoy. Is a shy conservative girl the type that gives you a warm feeling? The wild bad girl? Unpredictable and sharp? This is more than a few pigeon holes. This is important. Why? Because you have to know what you want if you’re going to find it. So, take a few minutes. Hell, take a week. Figure out what REALLY floats your boat. Joining your Dream Woman to yourself And once you’ve done that, I’ve got an exercise for you. Very new-age (well, Buddhist really), but very effective. Want to hear how it goes? Alright. 1. Bring the qualities you look for in a woman to the front of your mind. 2. Focus on the feelings that archetype brings out in you. Close your eyes and imagine her right in front of you, emanating energy. 3. Now, focus on connecting yourself to this woman and her energy. 4. Connect: Imagine a cord of green sex energy connecting your chest and her breasts. 5. Connect: Imagine a cord of yellow sex energy connecting from your eyes to hers. 6. Connect: Imagine a cord of red sex energy connecting from your groin to hers. 7. Connect: Imagine a cord of orange sex energy connecting the top of your stomach (the nervous center) to hers. 8. Connect: Imagine a cord of blue sex energy connecting your throat to her tongue. 9. Connect: Imagine a cord of gold sex energy connecting your forehead to her lips. 10. Focus on all six connections. Feel the sense of well-being this engenders. 11. Double the intensity of your feeling, taking note of what happens when you do so. 12. This is the trickiest part: you want to switch places with her. Step into her body and feel what she feels, see what she sees, and allow her to do the same with you. 13. Listen to her thoughts. Make notes of the best qualities she sees in YOU. 14. Return to your body, traveling through the six connections you have established and maintaining them. 15. Send her a feeling of anticipation… so she eagerly awaits the day you will meet her. 16. Count to yourself from 1 to 5 saying “Now I will count from 1 to 5. And when I do, I will awaken, feeling much better than I ever have before. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5… Slowly open your eyes. What in the hell was that? What just happened? Visualization. Alright, this relates to the baseball player imagining his homers. You need to SEE a goal to get to it. The more concrete the goal, the better your chances. You alert yourself – on both conscious and subconscious levels – to recognize the lady you want (and you’d be surprised how many guys miss her because they’re too busy worrying about something else during the crucial moment). What’s more, you relax yourself within the future situation – after all, you’ve already established a connection. The hard part is done. All that’s left now is letting the lady see it. Finally, you make chance encounters with the right type of woman MORE likely just be exercising the encounter. Where from? Who cares! Argue about cause all you want. Some will say you’ve established a subterranean connection to the woman of your dreams, so you are automatically drawn to her and situations will lend themselves to that spiritual need (like a suction cup). Others will claim all you’ve done is further educated your unconscious so it better guides you to moments your conscious mind might never have recognized and pursued. Me, I don’t much care how you decide to explain it. All I care about is IT WORKS. Now this is a hard exercise – creating one solid connection with an imaginary (or otherworldly) vision is difficult. Creating six and holding them while exchanging vantage points a few times is exponentially moreso. That’s fine. This is something you’ll have to practice every day, and with most people it’s a few months before they have a solid successful exercise. Nonetheless, once that exercise comes and is repeated daily, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. You can choose to believe it spiritual or psychological or meaningless or any other thing that makes it comfortable. The code you ascribe to it is not important. All that matters is you believe it works, and it will. That’s it. Simple concept, difficult practice. Keep at it. Don’t waste your time with questions – try it, get it working, and the answers that make sense for you will emerge. That’s all you have to worry about. Yes, this is yogic mastery over your reality (I told you we’d get more advanced). Yes, the world around you will change in unexpected ways as you proceed down this path. And yes already, it will help you find the right women for you. Isn’t that what this is all about? Derek Vitalio Check out Derek Vitalio material:
01:08 - Saturday, April 12, 2008 - comments {0} - post commentDating Outside The BoxSometimes the kiss is harder to get to than others – but you can still find it if you know how to act. And once you’ve started arousing her, finding sexual fulfillment is simple matter of staying PLAYFUL. Finding the Elusive Kiss So you’ve been touching your lady in a non-threatening, playful, and sexually stimulating way. You’re ready to go, and she seems into you, but for whatever reason, the CHANCE never seems to come. The kiss-me look never quite materializes, or it comes at just the wrong time (her cell phone rings, for example). She’s shy and never gives you a good head-to-head look from which you can lean into it (and twisting around her craned neck is NOT sexy). Whatever. It happens. What can you do? Well, one thing that works all by itself almost ALWAYS is this: Take Control Gently but firmly take hold of her chin between your thumb and index finger. Move her head to face you. Think sex scene in a movie. Chances are she’ll melt then and there and you won’t have to say a thing. HOWEVER, sometimes you’ll have a woman who wants to PROVE just how strong she is, or how cool she is, or she’ll just be so nervous that she’ll actually pull away slightly even though she WANTS to be kissed. What do you do? Be straightforward: say “Do you want me to kiss you?” If she says yes or nothing, just do it. If she says maybe, say “Let’s find out.” and do it. And if she says no – unlikely given the build-up you’ve gone through to get here – say “I didn’t say you could – you just looked like you had something on your mind.” in a playful teasing tone. Don’t act let down – you were just PLAYING with her. Get it? Wow, that was easy. Be bold by not caring You need to be BOLD here – although bold isn’t the right word. Bold suggests you are doing something DESPITE doubting yourself or the result. It suggests a bravery that you want to erase. WHAT?!! I don’t want you to be BRAVE? That’s right. I want you not to care. Listen, OBVIOUSLY you want to score. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t go to the trouble of wooing this lady, or setting the right mood, or reading this book even. But you can’t let that be your OBVIOUS DIRECT goal when you’re in the process. You need to concentrate on the PROCESS, and your GOAL should be as slick as you can. Do that, and yeah, the sex will come (woohoo!), but if all you worry about is the sex that gets telegraphed to your lady in the worst possible way. So, again, RELAXED playfulness is the key. While you are sexually cuing her you don’t want it to be overtly SEXUAL, as we’ve discussed before. You want it to be FUN. Too many guys go for the template of a pattern just because it’s established and expected. It doesn’t have to be that way – YOU can control your reality, you should do what’s going to make you happy. The options are more open than you know. Welcome to the new view, Grasshopper Alright, if you’ve been reading carefully up to now, you have a solid understanding of the basics for attracting the women you want. Congratulations. You’re starting to get a solid understanding of the three pillars – playful confidence, social status/value, and non-verbal cuing. There’s plenty left to learn, but you have enough knowledge to really work on your attitude and internalize the important aspects of attraction. Again, congratulations. However, before we go any further, I have a VERY important question: what are you going to do with this? “Uh, get laid, Beavith.” Come on, you can do better than that. What kind of dating life do YOU want? MOST of the men in the world choose one of two paths: straight-up monogamous relationships, or a series of meaningless physical conquests. But is that what you REALLY want? Or do you place yourself in one of these categories because that’s the way our social world is currently organized? If you’ve thought about what you want to get out of your romantic life and you’ve decided on one of these paths, great. Nothing wrong with that. But be honest – isn’t it because you haven’t seen any other realistic choices? The two choices most guys think are the only choices. Our world places the long-term meaningful relationship as the top of the pyramid, the thing we all should aim for with the thought of eventually finding a girl to marry. Don’t get me wrong – nothing can replace the spiritual and emotional connection of a serious relationship. But plenty of guys aim for serious steady relationships more because they finally GOT a girl, and they’re scared of being lonely again. But a number of guys don’t want to DO that – at least not yet – and instead want SEX. And lots of it. And the excitement of the chase, of flirting. The problem with this is, even if you’re the master player and can get a girl anytime you want, you never really have a chance to experience the deeper emotions. Just get your rocks off. Most guys eventually get as bored of this life as you would dating a nun. Ok, it’s a completely different kind of boredom. But you usually wind up seeing a wide variety of party girls, and the night after the morning you get this awful empty feeling. So you go find the next girl to fill that void, but you wind up just making it deeper and more painful. And that guy often winds up getting REALLY lonely and searching out a long-term relationship – but he lacks the relationship experience and so thus is a poor judge of what he’ll need in a more serious mate. He either tries to convert a party girl or he scattershots the rest of the population, getting poor mates as often as good ones. What if there were other ways? A fuller menu Let’s take a moment now and run down all SORTS of different ways of dating that are ACTUALLY available. Monogamous Man. As mentioned before, this is a GREAT way to get all the good things that pair-bonding brings. However, you also greatly reduce your experience; instead of being out and dating lots of women and finding out what all sorts of different types there are – and how they fit with you – M Man gets stuck in looooong relationships. They usually go a month or two too long, the girl is usually the one doing the dumping (“I just need some space to think about things.”) and there is a tendency to stick with sub-standard situations due to the lonely fear factor. Oh, and unfortunately, rarely does a monogamous relationship stay that way. Pain all around. The Player. You have plenty of sex with plenty of women, but never more than a few sessions with any one. Great way to hone your attraction skills and see what’s out there – in fact, in the beginning of your dating life, being a player is a nice start so you can gain experience. However, you lose out on the deeper emotions and rare is the man who is fulfilled by a lifetime of playing. Multiple Primaries Guy. You have long-term relationships, but you aren’t monogamous. Some guys do this while pretending to be M Man, but it works best if you’re up front about it. (Avoid all the deception and eventual pain when you’re found out. There are girls who will comb your cell when you’re in the bathroom. Beware.) Most guys don’t think is a realistic possibility, but you’d be surprised. If a woman is attracted to you and you’re honest about your lifestyle, she’ll usually adapt to your reality. There may be numerous brush fires to put out, but you can avoid a lot of that by having girls who like EACH OTHER and are into SHARING you. Bisexual ladies welcome. Threesomes welcome. A Primary with Secondaries Dude. Here you have one serious relationship, but you also have some other girls for fun (either steady sex friends or random pick-ups). Again, your lady knows about the other women, but she accepts them as part of being with you. And you are emotionally faithful to your main gal. You can even bring her in on the fun – picking up women as a couple is easier than you think, and often easier than doing it on your own. And it can be a lot of fun. You also are playing a dangerous game, because should you ever start to bond with one of your sex friends, your main lady is gonna be pissed. It’s a LOT harder to go from Primary and Secondaries Dude to Multiple Primaries Guy than vice-versa. Your lady is going to feel betrayed and, worse, demoted. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Harem Harry. Now you are just having some serious fun. Any combination of primaries and secondaries, with everyone aware of everyone else and often playing with each other. You are the center of a sexual universe. As long as the girls know what they’re getting into from the start, you won’t have too many problems. Oh, you’ll still have problems – every relationship has problems – and occasionally they’ll seem huge just because you have so MANY relationships to keep healthy. Still, you can avoid most the Glenn-Close-with-a-knife problems since you are emotionally connected but still emotionally free. Free love man. Ain’t it great? (As a note, sometimes harems have more than one “Harry” with the guys sharing the ladies.) It’s not unheard of for a MP Guy or a PwS Dude to become a Harem Harry. Players make the transition as well. Swinging Stud. Now you’ve got one main lady, but you attend parties or clubs looking to swap with others or get involved in orgies. This can also take the form of finding a third for a threesome while out and about. Now, that’s a LOT more possibilities than you thought were out there. They all have advantages and drawbacks, and you should choose a goal that works for you. BUT, you should establish the GOAL first and create the attitude and reality that works with it. Because it’s MUCH harder to change a relationship mid-stream than to have things clear from the beginning (not that it can’t be done). You can change your goals as you yourself change. Of course you’re not locked in to any one way. Maybe you start as a player, find a great girl and stop going out with anyone but. Or maybe you build a Harem but get bored with the sex that is nothing more than physical, and so pick out a few girls as multiple primaries. Or you end a monogamous relationship date a number of women – all secondaries – until one separates herself from the pack and you pair-bond with her, but keep the rest around for fun. Or maybe you have a gal you love as much as anything, but you want to spice up your life with a little swinging. So you take her to a club, she watches the openness of the people there, and you slowly transition from an observing pair to a participating one. The permutations are endless, so don’t think TOO hard about this. You can always change your goals later. But you should establish the GOAL you have RIGHT NOW before you go out. And you should do it because YOU want to, not because it’s what you think the world expects. Derek Vitalio Check out Derek Vitalio material:
01:04 - Tuesday, April 8, 2008 - comments {0} - post commentYou Are Not Special I want to share with you an email I've gotten from a fan of my site which I find to be quite troubling... Hi Joseph, My Response: This type of e-mail is not an isolated instance. I get many e-mails from guys saying things like: "I like your tactics, but they won't work for me." "If I tried something like this, I'd get laughed at and rejected." "If I actually approached a woman with this material, I'd spontaneously combust, scanners-style." Well, you get the idea... When I e-mail these guys back asking if they've actually *bothered* to go out and try my techniques, the answers are usually always: "No. I just KNOW it won't work." Well, for those of you out there who think this way, I have a secret I want to share with you... YOU ARE NOT A SPECIAL CASE! Seriously, most guys who have the toughest time with women think that no matter what they study, it won't work for them because their case is unique and different from every other guy out there. Well, I'm here to tell you you're wrong. I've learned through experience that most guys are not very different from each other, just as most girls aren't very different from each other. In fact, a friend of mine summed it up best when he said: "All women are different. But not THAT different." The same goes for us dudes. We all have the same fears and insecurities. We just deal with them differently. Most guys deal by shutting down and not even trying to improve. Rather, they take the easy way out and just blame the world, other women, their circumstances, etc. They even blame themselves, yet they prefer to beat themselves up rather than take responsibility to IMPROVE their circumstance. There's a name for that type of guy, and it's: L-O-S-E-R But the thing is, they don't have to stay that way. All it requires is a little hard work and effort on their part to CHANGE THEIR LIFE FOR THE BETTER! In my book, The Art Of Approaching, I give you SPECIFIC tactics on how to take the bull by the horns and improve your social life. No one says it's gonna be easy. You gotta do the work. But right now, I'm offering free support by email, so you'll have some support as you take this journey to improve your life! I won't be offering this kind of support forever, so take advantage of it while you can. You can find out more information here: It's time to change your life for the better, don't you think? Wishing you success with women, Joseph Matthews 07:11 - Friday, March 21, 2008 - comments {0} - post commentHow To Meet Women In Nightclubs And Streets Question From A Reader: Dear Joseph, My Response Okay, I guess I'll try tackling each question in order... First, Nightclubs ARE very difficult venues. Unless you're specially suited to the party-style nightlife, these venues will be a bit daunting. And even if you are predisposed to this type of pick up, you will still have to deal with lots of competition from other men. That said, it's not impossible to meet women in nightclubs. But it will require you to be a little more outgoing and aggressive than other venues. First off, when I'm in a club, I tend to like to hang out in open-air areas where I can talk to other people easier. Patios and right outside the club can be good for this. Most clubs will have some form of outdoor area where you can hang out -- especially places like New York and Los Angeles where you're not allowed to smoke inside. The dance floor can also be quite effective. If you like to dance, go out there and try dancing with the women who are dancing by themselves. If they're not into it, move on. If they are, it's PLAY time! =) Also, keep in mind the time at which you're going to the club. Usually, the later it gets, the easier it is to pick up a girl (this is because as it gets later, people are more pre-disposed to "hook up" due to alcohal, desperation, boredom, etc.). Second, to approach women on the street takes a bit of finesse. In America, people do tend to be a bit more private than in other parts of the world. My best advice in this respect is to actually follow the girl for a bit and see where she's going. If she stops off at a coffee shop or a bus stop, or whatever, THAT is the time to approach her! If it looks like she's going someplace you can't follow her into (like her home/dorm, for instance) then you'll have to take the chance and try approaching her cold. But make it a quick approach and include a time constraint ("I know you're on your way somewhere, this'll only take a second..."), get her number as quick as you can, then move on. Finally, when it comes to the "boyfriend" thing, that's a matter of personal taste. Some guys don't want to mess with that, others don't care. The thing is, most women aren't THAT committed to their boyfriends, so it's not as big of an obstacle as you might think. The important thing to do in this situation is to try and "read" the woman. Sometimes, a girl will tell you she has a boyfriend when she really doesn't because she wants to politely reject you (and sometimes she really does have a boyfriend and wants to stay faithful to him). If this is the case, you have to look at the signals she's giving you to see if she's actually into you or not. If a woman does like you and IS in fact into you, she will usually with-hold the fact that she has a boyfriend. And if she does bring it up, she wants you to take the lead and "sweep her off her feet" so she won't have to feel guilty about cheating on him. So when that's the case, it's time to pump up the agressiveness on you're pick up. If you want to learn how to read a woman, check out my book The Art Of Approaching, I devote an entire section of my book to this. I go into great detail on how to spot the subtle signs a woman gives off to let you know she's interested in you, and how to use this to your advantage! If you haven't read my book yet, I'd highly recommend you do! You can download your copy today here: There's no better time to improve your love life than right now! Check out The Art Of Approaching and see what kind of difference it will make in your life. Wishing you success! Joseph Matthews 07:09 - Friday, March 21, 2008 - comments {0} - post commentYou Know Where Women Are To quote the actor Chris Tucker - "It's Friday, you ain't got no job, and you ain't got sh*t to do!" 1. Happy hour. Okay, so now that we've covered step 1 & 2, it's time to go to the final step: MEET WOMEN. Let's face it, even though women's lib is going strong, women STILL don't typically approach guys. They wait for YOU to approach THEM. So that begs the question: How do you approach them? In my book, "The Art of Approaching," I go into this subject in detail. Inside my book, you'll find:
At the very least, walk up to these women and say to them "Hi!" But if you really want to SUPERCHARGE your ability to meet the kind of beautiful, interesting women you've always wanted, be sure to check out my book. You can order it now by clicking the link below: Wishing you success with women, Joseph Matthews 07:06 - Friday, March 21, 2008 - comments {0} - post comment |
Description A collection of seduction advice articles to help you become a seducer of women. It works! Home User Profile Archives Friends Seduction Teachings Pick Up Artist Advice Seduction PUA Seduction Diary Seduction Pick Up Artist David DeAngelo Neil Strauss www.facebook.co.uk Vin DiCarlo Recent Entries - Connecting With The Woman Of Your Dreams - Dating Outside The Box - You Are Not Special - How To Meet Women In Nightclubs And Streets - You Know Where Women Are |