Monday, January 28, 2008 - My 19 Year Old Son is Dating Women My Age
This is freaking me out. My son is good looking, smart, into sports and girls are crazy about him. But any time he brings a girl...I can't even say girl, cause these are WOMEN. Anytime he brings one around, I am looking at someone who should be one of my friends. These women he dates are my peers. He has dated a 34 year old, a 37 year old and it seems to be getting worse. The latest one calling the house is 40. I have talked to him and asked him why they need to be twice his age. This is very disturbing, to say the least! He just says he likes them mature, and that they have more to talk about. They are more interesting than the girls his age.
I think it's a sex thing, myself. But he won't admit that. I have tried my best as a single mom to be the best mother I could to him, sacrificing a social life of my own practically, just to make sure he had whatever he needed all his life. So why is he out here looking for mommies? That's what it seems like to me. And these women can barely even look me in the eye when I meet them. I asked the 34 year old what the hell she thought she was doing with a 19 year old, and she just said "he's a good guy". Can't they find good guys their own age? I don't know what to do!!! My son gets upset when I try to talk about it with him. What to do?
Gina
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Friday, November 30, 2007 - Is Bigger Really Better?
I am a good looking guy, and don't have a problem getting the girls. But I do know that I'm not exactly blessed in the wiener department. I know I'm not big, but I think I more than work what I've got. I have had a couple girls in the past remark on the fact that it's not big, but I didn't let that bother me.
The thing is, my girlfriend seems to like it. At least I thought so until I looked in this drawer where she keeps all these sex toys. I didn't even know she had them til I went looking for some matches one day.
What I saw in her drawer was shocking. She has some really huge, monster size dildoes of all kinds in there. I don't think I wouldn be as bothered about it if she had at least told me about them. And when I say huge, I mean HUGE, like King Kong dick size. 12 inches and about as thick as my wrist. One has two heads. She has them in all colors and some that even vibrate. I'm thinking, WTF? Does she really put those things all the way in her? I can't see how she does it. I didn't even tell her I found her stash. I guess she's not telling me about it cause she doesn't want me to get a complex? Well, too late now babe. I can't stop thinking about those crazy freak show toys I found in her drawer. Do women really get off on huge monster dicks, and if so, how can a guy like me ever compete?
Bummed out in Boston
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Friday, November 16, 2007 - What's the Deal Here? Is He Cheating, or What??
My Husband and I have been together for 5 years and we have 1 child. He's a very good father and she gets all the attention she could ever want from him, but ever since she was a baby he started ignoring me. He comes home from work and she's the one he kisses and says hi to. If I don't greet him he will just ignore me. One night I tested him by not saying a word to him from the time he got home from work to when he went to bed. He didn't say anything to me except "what's for dinner" and then he thanked me for dinner.
He goes to bed asks me to rub his back so he can fall asleep and that's the most attention I get from him. He thinks I'm being too needy wanting affection from him everyday. We used to have sex 4 or 5 times a week and it slowly got weeded down to the once every 2 weeks that it is now. I tried talking to him about it and he just says he's tired. I'm 95% sure he's not cheating on me just cause he lacks the time to himself and I haven't seen any evidence. I think I make myself too available to him. If it was up to me I would have sex everyday multiple times a day.
He says he loves me and he doesn't know how to show it. He says he's not comfortable with showing affection. I asked him if he wants me to leave and he says no. I don't know what to do, I love him very much.
Posted by StepOnMe
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Thursday, November 15, 2007 - My Girlfriend Doesn't Like for Me to "Please" Her
Ok. I bet you never heard this one before. My girlfriend doesn't like receiving oral sex. Yep. it's true. I can't really understand why, but anytime I try to go down there and show her some love, she pulls me back up.
In the 8 months we've been together, she let me go down once, and that was only after I begged, and convinced her that she'd love it, that I'd be gentle (because maybe some guy had been too rough? I don't know, she won't talk much about it). She seemed to enjoy it when I did it, but wouldn't let me go down to the lower floor the next time I tried. She always says "you don't have to do that". I'm like, but I want to. I love doing that to women. I think I'm great at it too. At least other girls have told me I am. I feel like my talent is being wasted! When I ask her, and I've asked a million times, she says she's just not into it. She'll do me, though, and is okay at it. I can't really tell if she enjoys doing me, but she claims she does.
what can I do here? I feel like we're both missing out! How can I make my girl loosen up and enjoy receiving something I really love to give? I'd hate to have to start making other arrangements. My girl is great all the way around except for that. Any advice?
T.
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Sunday, November 11, 2007 - I'm Starting to Hate Men....
I know this sounds harsh, but I'm really starting to hate men. They lie, cheat, bullshit you to get what they want, and once they're done, they toss you away like a used condom. My main question is, why can't guys just be honest? If you only want sex, why pretend that you want a relationship? Why get me to reveal my deepest thoughts, dreams and my complete soul, and pretend to be so into it knowing that the only thing that really matters to you is getting some. Why??
I have actually said to guys up front, if you want to have an open relationship, let me know. I don't mind you dating other people as long as you're open about it. That way I can protect myself emotionally and otherwise. But do they ever? NO. Men must see it as some fun kind of game to fool and trick a woman, making her think he's totally and only into her, but meanwhile he's fucking every chick in the known universe
I'm sick of it!! Every guy I've met in the past few years comes up with the same bullshit, like they're fucking retard clones or something. ALL I ASK IS FOR SOME HONESTY! Why is that so fucking hard?
I don't even want to date anymore. I wish I was a damn lesbian, but I'm not, so I guess I'll just be alone. It's got to be better than what the average guy out here has to offer. Which is NOTHING.
Lisa, Los Angeles
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Monday, October 22, 2007 - My Sister's Fiance Keeps Coming On to Me!
Hi, Love Diva.
I have this problem. My sister is getting married to a guy that she thinks is the greatest thing on earth, but I know for a fact that he's nothing but a sleaze who's going to cheat on her the first chance he gets.
I know this because he's been coming on to me and flirting with me anytime my sister is out of the room, or not around. I mean REALLY coming on! He's made really inappropriate comments about my breasts and other parts of my body, I mean really sleazy stuff...like how nice they bounce, and how he bets I have big nipples...stuff like that. It's creepy and I don't like it. He's also brushed up on me on a couple occasions while trying to pass by me in the kitchen of our house or anywhere that's close. He always says something like "sorry, but your ass got in my way", and it really pisses me off. I told my sister about it a couple times, and she got really nasty with me, saying I'm just jealous cause I don't have a fiance, and that her man would never be into me. When she lit into me like that, I was just like...okay, marry this loser, then. He's a slut and a whore, and she'll find it out soon enough.
In the meantime, how do I keep him off me? I actually hit him when he brushed up on my one time, but he just laughed and said he likes chicks that fight a little. I'm SO at the end of my rope here! I want to do something to make him leave me alone. My sister won't listen, she's such a dumb ass!
What can I do to deal with this creep?
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Thursday, October 11, 2007 - I Like Watching Guys Have Sex - And I'm a Girl!
I am fascinated watching guys have sex with each other. I'm a big fan of Queer as Folk, the series on HBO, and that show was the first time I ever saw in detail guys going at it. From the first season of Queer as folk, I was hooked! I also have a gay friend who has gay porn, and we've watched it together. i think it's so cool! I like to see guys relating to each other almost like guys and girls do. And the sex scenes are amazing!
The thing is, I've never told my boyfriend about this. He thinks it's wrong to be gay, especially when it's two guys. I really would like to watch gay guy porn with him, though. I think it would just be fun. He's so against homosexuality, though, that I know I can't even mention it.
Is there any way I can open his mind to this? It's not like I want him to DO the things on the movies, but just to enjoy and appreciate the wild, crazy , freaky side of me that likes this type of porn. Any suggestions?
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Thursday, October 11, 2007 - I Only Like to Have Sex When I Drink or Am High on Ecstacy
I know this might sound weird, but I can't have sex unless I'm completely hammered on Jack Daniels or ecstacy (or both). In fact, I like to drink because I know it makes me more wild and more fun to be with. I know I have a problem, but what can I do about it?
My very first boyfriend (when I was 14) was into doing exstacy, so of course, I did it with him all the time. Same guy introduced me to Jack and Coke. Can I just say that sex on E and Jack is amazing? It really is.
Now, I'm 24, and have been broken up with my boyfriend for 3 years now. I get guys easy, no problem. I'm slim, pretty and nice (most of the time) so they're always around. Every guy I know wants to date me.
But the problem comes with the sex part. I don't feel the urge to have it unless I'm high. I know this is not normal, cause my girl friends tell me so.
What can I do to be into sex without drinking or doing E? I don't want to have to depend on these things to be turned on sexually by a guy! help please
A.M. Minnesota
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Friday, October 5, 2007 - I Don't Have Any Fantasies. Is Something Wrong With Me?
I just wonder if I'm normal or not. I always hear people mention and talk about different fantasies that they have when it comes to sex. All these scenes, and different people they want to be with. I don't have thoughts like that at all. I mean, I like sex, and it's fun when I have it, but when I don't have it, I just don't think about it. Ever. It's like that part of my brain is cut off until I'm actually having sex. When someone asks me what my fantasy is, I don't have anything to say. It just goes blank in my head. Is that really abnormal? Is something really wrong with me? Why don't I have fantasies about sex like other people?
Anonymous
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Wednesday, October 3, 2007 - Why Do Guys Always Want a Threesome? (with another girl)
Hi, Diva...
I just want to know why guys are so into being with two girls (that I get) and seeing them go at it (that I don't get). My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years, and the subject of getting another girl to get it on with us keeps coming up (from him). I am happy with things just the way they are, and think that this is something that has no place in our relationship. Our sex life is pretty good, so I don't see why he needs this.
He keeps saying "just do it for my birthday", and "if we can do it once, I'll get over it and won't ask again".
I'm like, so ...we're supposed to go to some bar, pick up a strange girl and come back and have sex with her, and that will be good for us? I'm not even into girls. He says,"how do you know when you never tried? You might love it". Trust me, I KNOW I don't like girls! There's not even a question about that! Him saying that makes me think he doesn't care the least bit about my feelings on this. He just wants to do what he wants to do.
Another thing is, all the porn dvds he wants to watch with me are always girl on girl stuff. I'm sick of seeing it. It does nothing for me. It's like he's trying to convert me to the idea, and it's really just putting me off more and more.
I really love my boyfriend, but if push comes to shove, I can't see myself doing this. I have a feeling that if I don't, we're gonna break up. He keeps telling me that there are other girls out there that wouldn't make such a big deal out of if. Like a hint that he'll go elsewhere.
I don't know what to do. I don't want to lose my relationship, but I don't want to do a threesome either.
How can I get him off this obsession?
C., Miami
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Monday, October 1, 2007 - Why Can't I Keep a Boyfriend?
Dear Love Diva:
I have been trying to figure out why I can't keep a relationship. Over the past 3 years I have had a good 6 or 7 boyfriends. Every time I get with a guy, it's great at first, but after about 3 or 4 months, they start acting distant and aloof. The relationship ends soon afterwards.
The longest I've been able to keep a guy is 7 months. I thought I had made it through on that one, but soon enough, he started breaking away from me too.
I can't figure out what I'm doing wrong!! I am a good girlfriend, always attentive, supportive, I don't nag, I let my guys go out with their friends when they wanted, wasn't possessive, gave them sex whenever they wanted. I cooked for them too!
I try to dress sexy for my guy when I can, and do all the little romantic stuff like scented candles, garter belt and stockings, role playing, whatever he wants. Funny thing is, I always hear guys complain about their girls NOT doing those things, and here I do EVERYTHING they like, but they still leave.
What gives? This is really starting to make me depressed. Any advice, I'd be grateful.
J.
Brooklyn, NY
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Monday, October 1, 2007 - The Love Diva Is In.....Post Your Questions Here!
Hello all, and welcome to the Love Diva's blog! This is a forum where you can come to air out your dirty laundry, or really just to come and ask a question regarding love, sex, relationships....whatever is on your mind! You can post your question here, in the comment section of this opening post of mine, or if you want, email it to me at "thelovediva@gmail.com". Know that I will spellcheck edit anything that appears on the blog. Your question will also appear on my main site, so if you don't want the world to see it, don't post it here! lol The great thing about the blog is that you will not only get advice from me, but from everyone who reads it and cares to respond. Sometimes more than one point of view helps you think things through even better!
So don't be shy, if you have a question or thought, submit it!
Choose whatever anonymous name you like to protect your privacy.
I look forward to chatting with you!
The Love Diva
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Relationship and dating advice from a dating pro!
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